29 January 2012

One in Ten Recommend Kind Bud

A new study published in The Lancet finds that 11% of North Americans smoke the demon weed:

Researchers from the University of Queensland and the University of Melbourne in Australia assessed the global extent of illicit drug use and its impact on health. Authors reported that an estimated 10.7 percent of North Americans consume cannabis annually. By contrast, fewer than five percent of the global population were estimated to have used marijuana in the previous year.

Australians reported the highest levels of cannabis use, according to the study.


What the hell---Australians?

28 January 2012

21 January 2012

"All You Gotta do is Kiss Me, Kiss Me..."

From "All You Gotta Do is Touch Me" by Woody Guthrie:

I fully aim, to get my soul known again
As the maniac, the saint, the sinner, the drinker, the thinker, the queer
I am the works, the whole works
And it's not 'till you have called me all of these things
That I feel satisfied, I feel satisfied.

25 November 2011

23 November 2011

"What Has Two Thumbs and Just Registered for Dark Odyssey: Winter Fire?"

This guy!

I've Been Neglecting You, and I'm Sorry

Funny thing happened on my way to become a podcaster---I forgot to post anything for a month.

A month!

"How did this happen?" he wonders, typing with his right hand and holding the bong in his left. "Hmmm...you don't think..?"

I'm happy to report that the time hasn't been wasted. I've written out a format and outlined the first two segments of show one. Next step: learn GarageBand.

I feel like I've done all the prep work I need to in order to start blogging and producing in earnest. We're still on schedule to launch in January.


23 October 2011

I Like Big Bongs and I Cannot Lie



I was in The Great Lakes State last weekend and I got to sample some of Michigan's finest medical marijuana. The strain we were smoking was called Bubblegum, and it was wonderful---smooth, lethal, and gave a happy happy high.

The only problem was that almost everybody I know in Michigan rolls joints. We smoked joint after joint after joint. And I realized something.



I don't like joints.

They're messy. They're harsh on the lungs. They never burn evenly. And despite every one's best efforts, they always get slobbery at the tip. Yuck!

Of course, my first experiences with cannabis was in the form of joints, and that's how I smoked through most of high school. Papers were cheap and easy to hide from the prying eyes of parents. But around my senior year I discovered water pipes---bongs! And to this day, a bong is my favorite way to smoke.

They're fancy. They cool the smoke. They burn fast and clean. And they just look so cool when you take a big hit off 'em. Hooray!

If you light a fatty and pass it to me, I'll be happy to hit that shit. But when we're at my house, let's pull out Mr. Bong.

22 October 2011

What's in a Name?

As you can tell by the author stamp at the bottom of this post, I've decided to be completely public about this blog and podcast. Don Myers is my real birth certificate/drivers license/passport/milk name, and I'm proud to use it as the host of this podcast.

There are certain advantages to being a public sex and weed blogger. It is my intention to turn this project into a career some day, and I consider this blog a tentative first step in that direction.

Plus, goddess forbid this podcast ever get me stoned or laid. I'm just sayin', is all.

Of course, there are some disadvantages as well. I don't particularly want my vanilla family and friends to find this website, but sooner or later they will. I accept that as a fact but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. If I want to be a public figure in this industry, I've got to be able to stand up and say to all that will listen: "Hello! I am a professional sex-positive weed smoker and here's what I have to contribute."

Plus, if the NYPD ever finds my blog it will be hard to plead the Fifth Amendment.

So there it is, people. I'm Don Myers, 52, SWM of New York City. If you want to know more, just ask. I'm sure I'll leak more information about myself as we go forward, but that's a start.

How ya doin'?

It's Time To Roll Up My Sleeves

...aaaaaaaannd, We're Back On the Air!

I spent last weekend visiting my family back in Michigan. My vanilla, conservative, slightly redneck family. Oh well, I love them very much but there is so much I cannot share with them. So I am glad to be back among pervy stoner friends.

I have two younger sisters and they both smoke dope, but they are pretty reserved sexually speaking. I realized this when one sister confessed to me that she knew a poly couple. Oh my goddess---she was totally freaked out about it! She thought they were disgusting perverts and wanted nothing to do with them. I just smiled and thought to myself "If you only knew..."

I also got to hang out with some wonderful friends that I've known since high school, and I got turned on to Michigan medical marijuana. That stuff is fuckin' lethal! I took one hit and went directly to my happy place. All in all it was a wonderful trip but it's time to come back to New York and get started on this podcast project.

Stay tuned kids, there will be excitement to come. I promise. In the meantime, please enjoy the view.

13 October 2011

And We're Outta Here!


It's time for me to board a plane and go visit my vanilla friends and family back in Michigan, so there will be no posting here until Tuesday October 18. I plan to start posting segment ideas and outlines to give you a taste of what the podcast will sound like. In the meantime, here's my favorite sign from Occupy Wall Street.

Take care and I'll see you later.

12 October 2011

Simian Mind Control

Some monkeys feel love,
Some monkeys feel pain,
Some monkeys move objects with their brain!

In a research conducted by professionals from the Duke University Center for Neuroengineering, 2 trained monkeys seemed to use their brain to move an avatar hand and recognize the texture of objects they could see.

It's Not That Hard to Figure Out

If I hear one more person say that they don't know what Occupy Wall Street stands for, I'm gonna slap them. Here's Alan Grayson explaining it all for you.

10 October 2011

Tissue of Lies

Metro NY is a free newspaper that they give out at subway stations and which litter the trains like snowdrifts. This morning they had a blaring full-page headline: Sex, Dugs, and Occupy?

It’s gone from movement to mayhem.

Sex, drugs and fighting run rampant at Zuccotti Park, Occupy Wall Street protesters say, and even they are getting sick of it.


This is, of course, bullshit. I was there for two days and saw no evidence of sex or drugs---and believe me, I was looking for both. I did flirt harmlessly with a stoner couple, but they were out of weed too. That's about as "out of control" as things got.

What I saw was a functioning town that had been erected by OWSers themselves. There were kitchens, first aid stations, sanitation, a newspaper, and more. Yes, there was a drum circle, what of it?

The conservative corporate media wants to marginalize the movement, and nothing scares conservatives more than sex and weed. Except maybe rock 'n' roll. But it's important to remember that we represent the bottom 99%, and we will not be moved!

07 October 2011

Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging

Things have been chaotic here at Sex and Weed headquarters, so let's keep it simple. How is the Bard of Barney Miller doing re: mortality?

30 September 2011

Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging

Take a tour of one of New York City's hot spots with Andy Richter and The Artist Formerly Known as Fish!

27 September 2011

WWB: Walking While Black

Here in New York, the NYPD is famous for stopping and frisking random people in low-income neighborhoods. And by "random," I mean "non-white."

From 2005 to 2008, approximately 80 percent of total stops made were of Blacks and Latinos, who comprise 25 percent and 28 percent of New York City’s total population, respectively.


The cops often find a small amount of marijuana, which is not illegal if it's not in public view. But when the cop tells you to empty your pockets and you've got some weed, voila! It's in public view and you get arrested.

But there is some good news out of One Police Plaza:

Police Commissioner Ray Kelly has issued an internal order to the New York City Police Department commanding officers to stop arresting people for small amounts of marijuana possession, if the marijuana was never in public view. The directive comes at a time when the NYPD is taking increasing heat about alleged improper marijuana arrests.


Whether or not Kelly's order will be obeyed is another issue entirely.

Memories of Camp



On the day Dark Odyssey ended, the lovely and talented Artemis Hunter took this picture of the wastebasket. Nothing but beer bottles and used condoms, with a few spare feminine hygiene products.

Proof that a good time was had by all.

23 September 2011

Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging

Let's face it---Saturday Night Live has grown lame and needs some help. Who can save this show? The Bard of Barney Miller, that's who!

22 September 2011

More Monkey Science

Some monkeys stay home,
Some monkeys will roam,
Some monkeys have a map of their whole genome!

Using a combination of sequence alignment and exon size conservation, more than 20,000 transcripts in the cynomolgus monkey genome were predicted and used to build a M. fascicularis-specific gene expression microarray on the Roche NimbleGen 12x135K platform, in less than two months enabling comprehensive yet economical transcriptome analysis.

Back in the Saddle

...aaaaaannnnd we're back.

Dark Odyssey was, as it always is, a major life-changer. I learned some things and taught some things. I connected with people I love and made awesome new friends. I smoked California medical marijuana and I drank a lot of good beer.

More importantly, it was my own private cotillion. I introduced myself to the scene as a single man instead of being one half of "Don & Ivy." It felt good and I'm happy to say I was received with open arms.

Without a doubt, the highlight of the event was meeting erotic rope artist and educator Artemis Hunter.

The best class I took was "Theater Games for Better Sex," which combined my extensive improv background with my penchant for debauchery. Here's the class description:

People with improvisational theater training know three things you don't about how to make a scene out of nothing, and/or keep one going if it gets away from you. Excellent for eager newbies and jaded ancients, the straightest of couples and the queerest alike will learn how to seamlessly become new characters, take old standbys in new directions, and incorporate new ideas on the fly without missing a beat.


It was great, and reminded me of my days at the LA Connection.

Now I only have to wait 5 months for their next event.

13 September 2011

Vacation, All I Ever Wanted...



And we are outta here! Tonight I'm packing for Dark Odyssey, five days of sex and weed in the middle of nowhere. No wifi, no laptop, no smart phone, nothin'.

I promise to come back soon with great stories and insights, but for now you'll just have to entertain yourselves until I get back.

09 September 2011

Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging

Dance, Dance, Dance to Abe Vigoda's Dead (Premortem Mix)!

07 September 2011

06 September 2011

Recession Blues


The Bush recession has hit me just like it's hit everyone I know. I'm not complaining, because I still have it pretty good---I have work that pays the bills, I have my health, etc. Seriously, a lot of people in my neighborhood have it a whole lot worse than me. But I have had to tighten my belt a bit.

As a result, I've had to slash my weed budget by 50%, which leaves me with an interesting choice. Do I reduce quantity or quality? Do I continue to buy the top-shelf stuff and smoke half as much, or do I buy ditchweed and smoke more?

02 September 2011

Put Down That Burger and Pick Up a Bong!

I have lost weight since I started back on weed, but it turns out I'm not alone:

Americans who don't use marijuana are more likely than cannabis users to be obese, according to a study conducted by two French scientists, recently published in the American Journal of Epidemiology. Using data collected by previous investigations, the authors of "Obesity and Cannabis Use" found that folks who smoked cannabis three times a week were about 50 percent less likely to be dangerously overweight (22 percent of nonsmokers were obese, compared to 14 percent of smokers).


Life Goes On

I ask my readers (both of them) to forgive my lack of posting this week. My soon-to-be ex-wife dropped a 50-megaton emotional bomb on me and I've been a basket-case trying to deal with it.

In the days and weeks to come you can look forward to more stoner chicks, porn, and of course Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging.

Thank you for understanding.

Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging

The Artist Formerly Known as Fish goes solo:

26 August 2011

Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging

Get down to the heavy heavy monster sound of Abe Vigoda!

24 August 2011

A Rose By Any Other Name?

If you're a kinkster who works in education, this is your worst nightmare:

The chancellor of the University of Northern Virginia exposed as a sadomasochistic sex-dungeon master following a school raid by federal immigration agents last month has submitted his resignation.

NAME REDACTED, 64, was revealed as a man so into domination and sadomasochism that he and his girlfriend turned their basement into a suburban sex dungeon....

The Smoking Gun found the personal ad after the raid - complete with photos of his dungeon and Lee performing sadomasochistic acts - on a website called collarme.com, which describes itself as the 'largest BDSM Community on the Planet'.

The ad sought 'attractive submissive women' who 'wish to be part of our poly family'. ...

The media printed the guy's full name, of course. I redacted it because I feel sorry enough for the poor bastard, I don't want to spread it around.

Which got me to thinking about whether or not I want to use my real name on the podcast.

I'm currently researching microphones but I need to address this soon. In the meantime, here's a picture of my dream microphone, the Telefunken U-47.






Thanks to the Nat'l Coalition for Sexual Freedom

19 August 2011

Rush Out Now in a Buying Frenzy!


I have a very hot date next weekend with one of my Dark Odyssey friends, a curvy and insatiable sex fiend named Cindy. Cindy and I have spent many a naked hour, smoking a pipe and fucking each others brains out. This is the first time I've every had her all to myself for a whole weekend however, and I've been thinking of ideas of things to do with her beyond sex.

"I know!" I said to myself in a rare moment of lucidity. "I'll take her bong shopping in the Village!"

I use a bong all the time, and I have a perfectly serviceable red plastic 1 footer named Mr. Bong (and yes, I name all my pipes). But I don't have a really nice one, a special occasion bong, a bong that makes people go "Wow! Let's smoke outta that motherfucker."

I lean toward ceramic bongs because they're easier to clean and besides, who wants a clear view of your bongwater?

I used to have a great black ceramic double-chambered bong named Watson. He was named, of course, after Dr. John Watson M.D., but it was always fun to shout "Come here Watson, I need you" whenever we reached for him.

I'm thinking of going for a real fancy glass one this time, at least three feet, the kind with baffles so you can put ice cubes inside. This is not intended to replace Mr. Bong, but give him some relief. I'm looking for something with a wide bottom and a long neck, like the bong in the photo on the right.

Most of all, I want to find a bong that will look good while Cindy smokes it naked. I'll try to get her to pose with it between her magnificent tits.

Friday Abe Vigoda Blogging

Looking for something good on teevee? Now you can watch 25 DVDs of the seminal work of The Artist Formerly Known as Fish!

Shout! Factory has announced the October 25, 2011 home entertainment release of Barney Miller: The Complete Series, featuring all 8 seasons of the much-loved show. The grand 25-DVD collection includes a 40 page booklet, new cast interviews, commentaries, as well as season one of the spin-off Fish, starring Abe Vigoda, which has never before been released on DVD.

17 August 2011

16 August 2011

Why "Sex and Weed?"

Why am I starting a podcast devoted to two very different (but equally awesome) topics?

Well, to explain that I'll have to tell you a little more about myself. I'll try to gloss over the boring bits.

I'm a professional dog walker in New York City, and I love my job. I get to work outside, I get fresh air and exercise, I'm my own boss, and I spend all day with dogs who are, let's face it, nicer than people. It's a hard physical job, however, and I'm not getting any younger. I don't want to develop back or knee problems. That's why I'm planning to do this for three more years, and then move on to something else.

I don't want that "something else" to be another dumb job. It'll be my last career, the last act of my working life, and I better make it a good one.

So I started making a list of the things I like enough to devote the latter part of my life to, and the list was a short one:

1. Sex
2. Weed
3. Comix


Comix is out---I had a career in comix once upon a time and I burned all my bridges behind me in a pretty spectacular way. So that leaves sex and weed.

Sex: Well, I don't think I could make it as a streetwalker or rentboy, but I wouldn't mind being in the pornography business. Sex toy retailer? Sex educator, maybe? I might be able to make a living selling bdsm clothing at events like Dark Odyssey. Or I could try writing sex books and/or erotica.

Weed: I'd love to work in the medical marijuana business, but that means leaving New York. I might move to Michigan or California---I've lived in both states and still have friends there. I've been lurking on THC Jobs and I've seen a lot of positions I could be successful at.

So there it is---my next career will either be in the sex industry or the weed industry. Some days I lean toward sex, other days I lean towards weed. But I've got three years to make a decision and build a new business for myself, something I can do and do well for the rest of my life.

My hope is that Sex and Weed will help me establish contacts and learn about both industries. I hope it will be entertaining and informative as well. I've still got a lot of work to do before I upload my first episodes, but I think this will be good for me. I hope you'll enjoy it too.

But enough about me. Look at this Beaver Bong!